The 11pm question

Does my child need counselling?

The honest answer is maybe not. Here is how to tell whether a struggle is passing through, or moving in.

First, the honest answer

Maybe not. Plenty of childhood struggles resolve with time, sleep, and a steady parent, and no counsellor should tell you otherwise. The question is not whether your child struggles; every child does. It is whether the struggle is passing through, or moving in.

Signs it is worth a conversation

Read these slowly, and notice which ones make your stomach drop. That reaction is information.

How long, how wide, how heavy

The struggle has lasted months, not weeks
It has spread: school AND home AND friendships
Sleep, appetite, or school attendance has changed and stayed changed
The family is reorganizing itself around the problem
Your child is ashamed of, or frightened by, their own feelings

And the softer signs

A child who has gone flat: nothing delights, nothing interests
Old comforts stopped working: the hugs, the routines, the talks
You are walking on eggshells and calling it normal
Your gut has been telling you for a while, and you keep waiting for the right moment

What if I am overreacting?

Then a fifteen-minute call will tell you so, and you will sleep easier. That is a good outcome, not a wasted one. Sandra will say plainly if counselling is not what your child needs; a practice that runs on word of mouth has no use for clients who should not be there.

What if my child refuses?

Normal, especially for teens. Start with a parent conversation instead; changing how home responds often shifts more than anyone expects, and it opens doors later. Nobody is ever dragged into sessions here.

"At first I didn't want to do counselling but now I think it's really good, as it has helped me become more confident in speaking and discussing my emotions."

A client, age 9

Wondering which kind of help fits? See counselling vs coaching, or read about what actually happens in a first session.